After going to this last strongcamp in New York my goals changed…
The women I met there were amazing. 100 different women from around the country. I took so much away from this weekend but I also let things go. TAKE NO SHIT, DO NO HARM. I let go of the anger and some of my “sickness”. I needed to realize that i can not control every situation and I do not have to react. I just have to start listen. Listening is probably one of the hardest things for me because i just want to fix other peoples problems right away. I can always see a solution or how to put your first foot forward. I think that is because I have had to put my life together over and over . The greatest compliment that I recieved over the weekend was that I was a natural caretaker and nurturer. I have never thought of myself like this before. It was so nice to see in a different light.
We had the pleasure of going on a small hike in the woods. It was one of the most powerful things I have ever done in my life.
I no longer want to do a fitness competition to walk across stage for 9 seconds… It is just not me.. Plus I am having my surgery in December and I do not want to be that strict with myself. I am going to work on my mindset and just staying strong. Don’t get me wrong maybe I will do a show in months to a year it is just not for me at this time. I felt like i was not giving it my all and that is not okay. I have many physical limitations and it sometimes discourages me but I am not giving up just changing my agenda.
I realize I am not like everyone else I am different and thats ok.
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