As I sit here waiting for the nurse to come and reassess my situation I find myself contemplating my up coming operations. I feel like my little fighting solders have left the building. The last 11 years have been nothing but battles with doctors and their nurses. I am climbing this mountain with a ton of dark caves. Finding the best care for ones self is trying ,I am not sure how older people do it. Currently I am waiting for 3 surgery dates. I have had so many surgeries on my back they have caused a trigger point on the end of a cut off rib. Please do not let my enemies know that with one touch of it I throw up and drop to the ground, my bad ass bitch status will be out the window. In my case the trigger point is basically my nerves that have grown into one big ball and I picture it like heart worm on a dog. I really do not want another surgery but it is fucking up my muscles so bad by not firing right. Irritation from my doctor does not even describe how I feel, I just want a date that way I can schedule my life around it. Summer is almost upon us and I am no way in hell having surgery in the good months. Granted it does make recovery time a lot faster but this is the time I get my solace from my mountain retreat. As if I do not already have enough decisions with 3 kids and a husband.
The second operation is just IBT Therapy. The doctor is all for it but one must see the psychiatrist at the hospital to asses your situation. This battle has been going on for over a year. The brain doctor feels like it would just be one more disappointment for me in my life. He and I have met twice in the last year and both times I have had so much stress on my plate. He feels like in order for this to be done that I need a clean one. Knowing me that will never happen. I think the therapy is not going to be a long term solution just a short one but long enough so that I can get on my feet. I would be happy with 6 months, that is a enough time for me to get strong enough to do regular exercise. My doctor thinks this could work for my muscle spasms and pain. He is going to add several medicines to the pump instead of just one. I would love to have an upper torso that is not one big charlie horse.
Apparently I like my plate over flowing so why not give me bronchitis again. Dear higher powers that be, Pneumonia and pleurisy were not enough for you. I have had some form of a lung problem since last summer. while trying to figure out the lung issue they found out I have narcolepsy. Once again I am on antibiotics for 45 days. Ladies we all know what comes with antibiotics, a raging yeast infection. The kind that makes it swollen to ones knees, now only if my husbands dick was this big. When I went in to see my favorite doctor, the gynecologist, last week she also informed me that I have a bacterial infection and some growths inside. She is not sure what the growths are but guess what she is going to operate to take them out. We need to test that shit for cancer. My body loves to get C-Diff( I don’t wish this infection on my worst enemies) so I can not take any more antibiotics for bacterial infection. Did I mention this is the fastest way ever to loose weight. Shitting your brains out is just so much fun. When the nurse from her office call to inform me of the BV I had a little fight with her because she happened to make the comment, ” Well since you are refusing to take antibiotics for the infection the doctor wants you to use boric acid.” Immediately I turned into something even the devil will not fuck with. I replied, ” I am not refusing anything, but I just had a shit transplant so I am not supposed to take them!” I am pretty sure she did not have a clue what I was talking about because she said what about three times. Then I used the correct medical term, “Fecal Transplant because I was getting C-diff a lot and it was not leaving my body”. At this point in the conversation there was probably steam coming out of my ears because she repeated her self a few more times. Then she informs me that I have to find a Pharmacy that makes the boric acid compound. I am like what???? “That is your job.” She replied in a bitch tone. ” You need to call your regular pharmacy and find out if and where they make compounds!” My mind is screaming, ” Listen you dumb fucking bitch I already know that my pharmacy does not make compounds and since you are a pussy doctor ,who obviously did not even look at my file before you called me, you should already know who makes compounds since you are dealing with pregnant women all the time and that i just had a shit transplant. Do you know what it is like to now smell like your husbands shit after smelling like your own for forty fucking years. Weird and it creeps me the fuck out!!!” I did restrained my swearing brain, which for me at this point in y life is nothing short of a miracle and told her where to call in the prescription. We hung up and its been four days and the bitch did not call it in because I called the pharmacy . Instead of dealing with them again I ordered my own capsules online. PROBLEM SOLVED. Well I may have called practice this morning and put in a complaint.
One last grip then I am done with my rambling for the day. I think I have C-diff again so I am going for testing tomorrow. Won’t my husband be so excited to learn that he can be my shit donor again. Hahahahaha, jokes one me